The “N” Word: Growing Up

​The “N” word is a huge lesson I learned ​coming out of my last work situation/clinical fellowship. I was straight out of grad school, and very eager to begin working. I was living off the last of my student loan money, and had enough rent money to last through July.
Luckily, I had a mentor open her home to me in over-priced thriving D.C. while I secured my Clinical Fellowship position. Still, I was more than impatient through the job hunt process. I can’t even call it a process. It was a one and done. I interviewed with one place and did not want to bother with other interviews, not even for compare/contrast purposes. Dumb. Inexperienced, I know. I was in a desperate situation, however, I now realize I put that pressure on myself.

Negotiation was somewhere in my thoughts, but it wasn’t a pressing matter. Paycheck made the #1 slot. Paycheck satisfied the short term/immediate gratification goal, but I definitely regretted taking that job after knowing that position and all its taxing glory.

..about 7% of women attempted to negotiate, while 57% of men did.
                                                                                              –Forbes Magazine
The quote is taken from an article written for Forbes magazine (via the Daily Muse), highlighting the work of author Linda Babcock who studied gender differences in salary and negotiation habits. 7% vs. 57%…ain’t that about a….? Read that article here. Negotiation is a scary word. It’s even scary to type it with its endless vowels. Not only to me, but to many women according to studies. I’m sure there’s historical reasons for this (*clears throat* institutional sexism) I’m sure there’s a psychological basis for it. I’m just trying to very purposely go against those factors that be.
“The other problem is that women have systematically lower expectations.”
                                                                                            –Forbes Magazine
Me, asking for what I think I’m worth? Me, advocating for myself? Little ol’ me with limited work experience? YES. Ask away, honey.
Even if you don’t get exactly what you asked for, did they budge a bit? Yes? No?
What’s the worst thing that can happen?
You get a “No.” Then you get to decide if that’s a place you’d want to work. If not, it’s as simple as “Thanks for your time.”
Gearing up for this conversation gives me anxiety. Prepping for this conversation involves a script (because really, the art is in the persuasion and I’m perfect for fumbling over words), some guts and some assurance in my voice. I want to remind myself that I’m not trying to get over on anyone, I BE WORTH what I am asking for. A perpetual state. But, sometimes it’s hard to speak up, and be effective in doing so.
We womens needs practice!
The mentality shift I want in my life is: I’m not taking the first offer. Call me greedy. Call me ungrateful. You’d be lying. I worked very hard to get to where I am. No matter if you’re a Clinical fellow, 20 years in the field, or on the brink of retirement. Not everyone that has tried, has succeeded at speech language pathology. So why wouldn’t I look out for me? Companies look out for themselves. Bottom line. No one questions that, that’s “duh.”
So if I’m making money for your company– damn right, I’m looking out for me FIRST.
The “N” Word: Growing Up

2015 Came In: What’s Rockin’ My World


It’s really hard to say how I feel about the beginning of 2015. It’s only 20 days in and its come in like a storm. I’m learning how to cope with some of the news, and some days are good while others I don’t care much for getting out of bed. I’m still a part of the group psychotherapy however I’m starting to feel like I would benefit from individual therapy for a couple of months. I’ve even considered being evaluated for anti-depressants. The group has started to feel very crowded (there’s a total of 8 members) and although all 8 don’t come for every session, I always feel like my quiet demeanor gets lost and I don’t feel like competing for the “floor” right now.

I’m not in crisis mode. This year won’t get the best of me. I plan to make vacations a priority, even if it’s a small get-away every other month. Also, I will be 30 this year. I really don’t know where my 20’s went. However, I plan to bring in this birthday doing something DIFFERENT. No party. No exhausting birthday dinner where the check comes and everyone is calculating how much they owe down to the last penny. Just me doing something I love with those I love. Das it.

In no particular order, here’s what’s rocking my world:

  • The “documentary” Light Girls premiered on #OWN last night. I hadn’t watched the sister show “Dark Girls” but I was very much interested and curious on what the conversation would be about. Black Twitter, of course, had a ball going in deciding on what women on the show could be considered “Light” and which ones were actually “Medium.” I’m not here for that conversation. I really did want to hear the narratives and what topics would be uncovered. Here are just some tweets from last night:

Most people seemed furious over the show. I do admit, with good reason. The documentary seemed all over the place and not well-organized. Mostly, they had so many random “speakers” from comedians to celebrities to random doctors and I just couldn’t follow. I think they tried to “touch on” too many subtopics that they didn’t master honing in on one topic and expounding on that. I’m not sure if you watched or what you thought, but feel free to share.

  • I am more than halfway through my Clinical Fellowship. Hallelujah. I’ll be certified this year!
  • I didn’t get to take the mother-daughter trip I wanted to in December like I wanted to. I planned it too late. However, we are heading to Jamaica in April and I’m uber excited about it! I’ve decided on Montego Bay!
  • I know what my book is going to be about! Just have to get on a schedule to start and work through it!
  • I start re-paying my student loans next month. I know this is a big step for me. Budgeting has to be a priority now.
  • I cannot wait for Spring! This winter hasn’t been too brutal so I just hope it stays that way!
  • I haven’t seen Selma but I heard amazing things about it. I’ll think about going to see it.

What’s Rocking Your World this Month?

Do Share,


2015 Came In: What’s Rockin’ My World

“Limbo”: Post-Grad thoughts

It’s been a month since I graduated with my Master’s degree in Speech & Language Pathology. Post-graduate life has set in and although the relaxing, sleeping late, and free days have been awesome…I’m broke! Not in a “I can’t afford happy hour, or shopping” type broke way, but in a “I can’t pay my rent this month” broke. This is my last month in my apartment and then I’ll be in “limbo” until I secure my Clinical Fellowship (more about that later). The plan is to have a pretty easy-going summer and I only have one trip planned. I have yet to make a bucket list of what I want to explore in DC. The biggest goal right now, however, is to secure a fellowship that’s a good fit and to find a summer job to supplement the shenanigans I’m trying to get into this summer!

What’s the next step?

Before I become fully licensed as a Speech Pathologist (SLP), we go through (as many allied health providers) a Clinical Fellowship (“CF”). A doctor has his/her residency, and we have our fellowship. It is basically a transition point from student to fully licensed professional. Generally it can take anywhere from 9 months-1 year to complete (however, you can take up to 4 years to complete). As a CF, one is still under supervision and mentoring from a licensed SLP, and it is almost like the last time anyone is required to help you. After your CF, you are independent and left to your own devices.

The interviews have gone well so far, unlike other job interviews, none have felt like confrontational interrogatories. Most of the time, the employers just want to know that you know something about speech pathology and talk about your clinical experiences. It feels a bit like we have the best position considering the high need, and lack of people available. We have options. I was turned down for a job last week, but I wasn’t too bummed about it because I wasn’t considering it anyway.

I’ve been trying to identify why I’ve been having so much anxiety recently.

What’s bothering me?

  • I’m a Cancer, and home is pretty important to me. Although it’s going to be a short time (2 months tops), I don’t enjoy the “limbo” stage where I have to put my things in storage and have “temporary” homes.
  • No money, no socializing. It’s pretty hard to go out in DC on a budget. I worked hard at Shake Shack last summer just to have extra spending money, but now that I’m done with school every penny I’m making is going toward a bill. Bills, bills, bills.
  • I want to pick the right CF. Since honing in on my clinical skills is important, I have been on the search for a good CF where I’m going to be nurtured. I think I may have found it, we shall see.
  • Spiritual thirst. I haven’t joined a church here and I want to earnestly find one. I have a problem making commitments right now. But I definitely want to find a church community to be a part of.
  • Dating. Back on that train, and it’s been quite a ride. Part of me wants to be by myself for a while, but the extrovert part likes the company.

It’s almost a month now before I’m 29. BOOM. My blog-o-versary is in 2 days! GlobeTracer is still going strong and I’m adding more destinations to the list!

All in all, I have some things to be grateful for. Even in the midst of “limbo.”



“Limbo”: Post-Grad thoughts

Vegas Baby! Highlights in Pics

I really didn’t expect to like Vegas as much as I did. Besides spending a gazillion dollars (not by way of gambling) I really could not complain about the time I spent, the sights I saw, the food I ate and the things I did. Next time I go, I need to definitely be employed. And rent a car. And see more than “The Strip.” Las Vegas is rightly the entertainment capital of the world, but you don’t have to spend a fortune to see some amazing things.

Tuesday, May 21st

Bridal party rehearsal and luncheon at Red Rock Casino and Resort.

Something I’ve come to learn about myself is I love buffets! Does that mean that my standard for taste is relatively basic? I’m not sure. I think I just like the variety.

Why not have macaroni and cheese with chicken and broccoli?

Pasta and grilled corn on the cob?

Send it my way!

The Red Rock Casino’s buffet was gaudy, humongous and although everything I had wasn’t delicious, the majority of it was enjoyable and I really couldn’t complain.

Click pic for credit
Click pic for credit


Wednesday, May 22nd

WEDDING DAY! Garden wedding @ The Grove

Enough Aaaah’s to last me the whole year.

Dressing the brideDressing the bride II Cake DetailsDress  Superheroes Wedding pathBlack and White

Thursday, May 23rd 

My homegirl Dakota arrives from Los Angeles! *cue Rihanna’s Pour it Up*

Dining: Bahama Breeze takes the cake! During the week, they had a late-night happy hour from 9pm until closing and their Caribbean food was so amazing. During happy hour, the appetizers are half off as well! What more can you ask for?

One of everything, please?


Late night: TAO Restaurant and Bar. If you’re hardcore into just hip-hop and rap, you may want to go on the designated “black” night which I believe is Friday night.

Dakota's cousin, Dakota, She
Dakota’s cousin, Dakota, She

Friday, May 22nd

Day Pool Party at the Palms. Special Guest: Wiz Khalifa (Amber Rose in the cut supporting her baby faver)

Wiz Khalifa

Saturday, May 23rd

Return home. Plans to repeat in 2015. Occasion: 30th birthday!

Until next time,

Stay silly!

Mami and She
Mami and She
Vegas Baby! Highlights in Pics