Things that are Rockin’ My World: Is it June Yet?

Teachers be like

  • Testing and IEP Meetings
  • What my summer is going to look like. It’s still a blank slate.
  • I’m about 3 months away from 31. I like that number.
  • I’m in love.
  • I go back and forth between wanting a cat and a baby. On most days, it’s a cat.
  • I’m going to Chicago for Fourth of July and I want a foolproof way not to go broke.
  • I miss Costa Rica.
  • I am ready for a new work setting.
  • Game of Thrones is coming back on this weekend and I haven’t re-watched Season 5.
  • I’m not ready for my Sundays evenings to be kidnapped by HBO.
  • The internet will be broken this weekend after Beyoncé releases her new music.
  • The internet will be obsessed with talking about Yoncé for the week to follow.
  • Spring weather keeps playing with my emotions.
  • I love waking up to the sun shining into my bedroom and apartment.
  • Spring is my new favorite season.
  • I need new, simple recipes.

What’s currently Rockin’ Your World?

 

Things that are Rockin’ My World: Is it June Yet?

I’m 30, Now What?

(Part I of Unwritten Posts)

 for Shian

I’ve been 30 years old for 7 months now. Not very long, but long enough to notice some changes between my late 20’s and the third decade I have been privileged to see. These changes include (but are not limited to):

The GYM is NOT an option. My metabolism has definitely s l o w e d. However, my commitment to the gym has been a pleasant surprise with additional perks. There are great benefits to keeping a predictable schedule and not letting my monthly membership fees go to waste. For one, my physical health and stamina is reaping benefits. I know what gym routine works for me. It’s group exercise. I attend at least two classes a week, and on a good week, three. I go often enough to see familiar faces (don’t know anyone’s names yet!) and I feel an unspoken camaraderie between us. I am also pretty familiar with the dance routines, which allow more of that sense of belonging. Going to the gym has added benefits—it helps de-stress, clear my brain, and take my mind off a busy day.

BEING CHILDLESS AT 30 sparks intrusive questions. I was at a house party recently and I had a woman incessantly probe as to why I wasn’t drinking alcohol. Bish, get out my cup. I had just met her. But apparently, when people are intoxicated and small talking they feel the freedom to ask very personal questions. I realize that I’m at the age where people are usually on their second or third child. I am aware that I have a “biological clock,” however I’m not here to beat a clock. I know if that time comes for me, it’ll be when it’s supposed be.

BEING 30 and looking 23 is a blessing. Great genes are the gifts that keep on giving!

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Yes, that’s really my mother. #AlltheGenes

Mental health therapy is for me.  I treat my therapy the way I would treat a monthly hair appointment, or getting my nails done. It’s the way I maintain myself on the inside.

I can’t FAKE the FUNK, home is where the couch is. If I’m cranky and don’t want to be out anymore—I’m leaving. If I have already committed to something but get stuck on the couch, “I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to make it.” And in reality, even apologizing is soon to end.

I CAN’T BE OVERWORKED or STRESSED. I am a hard-worker by nature. Especially when it comes to my field, which I am SUPER passionate about. History has taught me that killing myself to make someone else money is not the move, and that “working too much” is not something I want to be known for. My life can’t be consumed by what I do and where I work. That’s just a part of me.

I PICK MY BATTLES. See previous point.

At 30, life continues to be filled with those moments that remind me how I don’t “look my age.” I’ve always felt more mature than the people who were my same age, and in my early twenties even hung out with people 5-7 years older than me. At 30, I think “10 years from now…where will I be?” How many passport stamps will I have? What coast will I be living on? Will I be happier? Will I have a published book?

These are all questions that have a direct bearing on right now. This moment. 11:44pm on a Tuesday night, sitting in front of the T.V. watching HGTV. Texting Brandon. Thinking about taking myself to the nail salon, because…I deserve pampering. The day-to-day moments that lead up to the life-altering ones.

I’m here for the moments,

She

I’m 30, Now What?

Lessons I’ve Learned: 2015

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Man, it’s hard to believe that in 15 days, I’ll be ringing in a New Year. New Year’s Eve makes me mad now. Not because I don’t want to welcome a new year; I’m earnestly thankful for it. It’s one of the biggest nights of the year and the question always boils down to What to do?

Honestly, I always prefer staying in. I don’t need no V.I.P table, no dress, no after party, no big plans. I don’t need to be doing something. If I had my way, all my family would be in one place– preferably out of the country, celebrating life. If out of the country is not possible, then in someone’s home. I’m at the stage in life where home is enough. I mean, there’s unlimited alcohol and you don’t have to drive nowhere! What can be sweeter? The only downside to bringing in the New Year at home is thinking about spending it alone. That’s not fun. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but not preferable. My plans this year are still undetermined. I can say, however, they will involve staying inside somewhere.

Even as I type this, I don’t feel like the year is over yet. It hasn’t really hit me. Maybe once we are officially on school break, I’ll start to believe it. Recounting my experiences this year, the bad ones come to mind first. Yea, I’m sure they inspired growth. But they still sucked. Maybe once I’m way over this hump… and over the anger, the disbelief, the ouchies of 2015 I’ll be able to truly appreciate it. Right now, I’m still angry. That’s okay. Things take time.

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Montego Bay, 6.6.15

I’ve also had some blessings this year– I turned 30, moved out on my own officially, got into some consistent individual mental health therapy, and have been practicing with my CCC’s! I gots letters behind my name now! I am on my way to becoming a self-sufficient, responsible adult. Below are the top 4 lessons/posts of 2015. I published my first post on GT in June of 2011. This year, I published 30+ posts. Thanks to you, I can continue to have a safe space to create and write things that come to my brain. Toast to 2016!

In case you missed them, my personal favorite posts of 2015:

Know Yourself, Know Your Worth

She’s Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Open Letter to Future Clinical Fellows (SLP)

I’m 30 Today (VLOG)

It’s not surprising that my posts revolved mostly around work. I was doing a lot of that in the beginning of the year. I have a much better work/life balance now. So much better that I am opting to add more work to my life. These include passion projects, supplemental income and hobbies. I pray your holidays and New Year’s celebration is safe and enjoyable!

Share with me one lesson you learned in 2015!

Happy Holidays,

She

Lessons I’ve Learned: 2015